No, I am not talking our professional resume. I am talking about our parenting resume. No kidding. I think God is looking for something that I don't have to be a parent, and quite honestly, it pisses me off.
Out of the nine stores that I manage, 7 of them have pregnant women working in them. And the announcements keep coming, week after week. These have all been since I have been back to work at the end of January! Now, as most of you know, with what I / we all, have been through, hearing this news can sometimes be "upsetting". I do not want anything to happen to any of them. But let me just tell you the resume of the expecting mothers to be...
1) One night stand, did not want a baby at all, but going to "try" and work out the relationship with the o.n.s.
2) cheating wife, with a husband and 2 small children at home. Obviously NOT happy w/ current husband, to be cheating, right? Supposedly it is said husband b/c cheating man is "out of town"
3) young single women, already has a baby by current baby daddy that hits the mom. She frequently complains that she can't afford the child / family life they have, he doesn't keep a job, drinks / drugs, oh yeah, and hits her.
4) one not sure of whole situation, young, single, doesn't work f/t.. haven't heard full story yet.
5) you single woman who just last month wanted to loose her boyfriend and find a new one. She is now 2 months pregnant.
6) one just had said baby, and has called me 2 x already ready to come back to work, she is "bored".
7) this one just had a miscarriage back at the beginning of Feb, right after I came back from loosing L.D. I quietly went to her and told her that I was sorry about them loosing the baby, and her response was, "oh, it is no big deal". My conversation ended right there. I found out about 3 weeks ago that she was pregnant, again, and this past weekend she lost another baby. Should I try and comfort, or will it again be no big deal
8)We had one miscarry at another store, again, not an issue
(I know everyone deals with miscarriages and losses very differently, and I RESPECT THAT.)
Now, I have nothing against anyone that is young or single getting pregnant, as I was that exact person 13 years ago. In the past 8 years that I have been doing this job, we have not had this many pregnant people, at all, or any miscarriages that I knew of. So I am thinking, OK GOD, WHY is this so IN MY FACE!!! Come on, have we not been through enough? I come home, upset, and it so does not help that I am going through the big fat anger part this wonderful grief roller coaster!. I talk to D and tell him about this stuff, not trying to bring him down. He is really good at being there for me. I just think, why o why, do I keep subjecting myself to this! I so want to quite my job! I of course have to keep on my "happy face". And to be honest, I can't even bring myself to congratulate them! I smile, and look happy, and I am, but in the back of my head I am thinking, I hope to GOD that nothing happens. But to be honest again, I think, even with their credentials, they will have perfectly healthy, wonderful pregnancies that lead to perfectly healthy wonderful babies.
So, I am leaving you all with my resume. If anyone, even just one of you, can put in a good word for us, I would appreciate it. I really would LOVE this job.
Happily married couple, both responsible w/ very good jobs, a big family to love and cherish a child, especially the happy parents. Would definitely spoil so desperately wanted baby and help to nurture and grow said baby into a respectful, happy human. This child would be raised with love, morals, responsibilities, many aunts and uncles and cousins, and grandparents. And of course, two wonderful parents, that want nothing more than to hug and kiss and hold and spoil a little baby. Dad is looking forward to teaching said child how to truck and farm. Mom would love to stay at home and spend all the time in the world with said child, to teach, nurture and grow. Said child would be showered with hugs, kisses, warmth, happiness, and love, everyday of their life.