Thursday, March 5, 2009

A little bit of everything....

This week has been pretty tough... I think that the first the months are tough because we lost Little Dale on the 9th, it was a Friday, and I think of everything that happened that week leading up to it..

I am learning about blogging. When I took some time off after loosing Little Dale, I learned about FB and MS. Now I have found out how to blog... I find that reading others blogs helps me to realize that what I am feeling is "normal". Not that anything, ever again in our lives will be "normal". Anyway, who gets to decided what normal it? I have often wondered that. I pray frequently for all the Mommies (and Daddies/families) that I have read their blogs, and their families. The pain is so real! I hope that someday, we can find some sort of true peace, and true happiness, but I am not sure that will happen.

My wonderful husband and I went to a SHARE meeting last night. We met some very special, courageous people at that meeting. We both came away last night with some relief as to what we have been going through is common. It is unfortunate that you have to meet some great people under such terrible circumstances. It helped us by talking to people that have been through what we have, and just by telling our story. We will continue to go.

I also met with our Priest on Tues. I feel as though I am loosing my faith, and don't' want to. I am having a very hard time going back to church. Since we lost Little Dale, I have only been 2 times, one to "my" church, one to a different one. I don't want to see people at my church or talk to them, and I am not to sure why? Going to a different church though was not the answer for me. The day I picked was a day that they were having a baptism, and there were several little babies in church. That was hard. I just didn't feel like I belonged. However, through the tears of talking w/ my Priest, it helped, a little.. He encouraged me to continue praying, and that GOD understands that I (we) are going through a hard time, and he is always there for us. I will continue to work on my faith, as I don't want to loose it. I will try my best to get to mass this weekend.:-)

GOD Bless all of you!

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